Wednesday, March 09, 2016

ON MARCH 10th SHUFFLE FUNCTION TURNS 6000(?) DAYS OLD!


SHUFFLE FUNCTION MORNING SHOW
6000th (?) BROADCAST
LIVE FROM THE ST PETER FOOD CO-OP

Thursday, March 10th from 6-9 am
KMSU 89.7fm/KMSK 91.3fm/kmsu.org

JUST ANNOUNCED: 
MACARTHUR PARK SING-ALONG @8:30!

There are some mornings is just doesn't pay to get out of bed.  Here's the long story...

A couple of months ago a dear friend of ours lost a loved one and we found out about a half hour before the show was to start.  This was one of those losses that you kind of need to be there for them, so Shelley scrambled to their side and I sped up to the station to find some archival Shuffle Function footage to run.  It was cutting it close, but we got the show plugged in and were still able to be there for them.  It was a rough day, and then Shelley was gone for the rest of week and I was all by my lonesome at the station.  Somehow I survived the week.

Flash forward to this week and we're super excited to be marking our 6000th morning show.  You guys have had a lot of great suggestions, and we're very excited to be marking it at the St Peter Food Co-op.  The gear seems to be working and we're getting some stuff together to give away to folks that stop by.  It's gonna be fun.  Then we get a text from a listener saying "hey, I'm doing the math here, and... are you sure it's gonna be 6000 shows?"

Whaaaaa?  We're not mathematicians, but yeah, we're sure.  Then Shelley checks through our log books and her face turns white as Mallory's butt.  I'd post a picture of his butt so you could see, but it's pretty gruesome.  Trust me when I say that Mallory's butt is as white as Shelley's face was.


That morning, when I raced up to the station to get the show plugged in, I accidentally flipped the 2 to a 5.  I INSTANTLY ADDED THREE THOUSAND SHOWS TO OUR LOG BOOKS.  How could that happen?  I'm friggin' amazing like that, that's how.

So why didn't this get caught until now?  I think the biggest reason is that the show number is essentially a benign catalog tool, and it only ever comes into play when you're suddenly "HEY, WE'VE ALMOST DONE 6000 SHOWS (but really it's only 3000)!"  Mostly it's just a number labeling a show, and maybe once in 3000 days is it a source of embarrassment.  Every once and a while there would be an error in the show number, but usually Shelley would catch it when she would enter the playlists.  Since she was gone for the rest of that week I just picked up the next day like there was nothing out of the ordeinary.  Sadly, our "Day Jobs That Support our Radio Habit" suck all our time and energy away from things like entering playlists in a timely fashion, but that really hasn't mattered much... UNTIL NOW.

I mean, if you step back and look at the timeline... sure, it makes ZERO sense data-wise to think you can cram 6000 shows into 12 years, but in another sense 12 years is such a large number that we were like "sure, this makes sense. Big number equals big number".  These three hours are still the best three hours of our day, and they just keep getting more and more fun.  It hasn't ever felt like the time has ground on, and twelve years has passed like nothing, so we didn't even question it.  But you know what isn't fun to us?  MATH.

This is what it looks like when Tim tries to do math.

Honestly, neither one of us is a math champ, but for me it's a paralyzing thing.  Have you ever had to do the "Five Dysfunctions of a Team" exercise?  It's a team building thing that helps groups develop trust and look for ways to improve.  I've had to do it a few times, and it's both enlightening and annoying.  Anyway, there's a part of it where people are supposed to talk about something that has been difficult for them in their lives.  Every single time I've said math.  Nothing makes me feel worse than having to do math.  It's an alien language to me, and I can't make it click.  I even remember the moment in first grade where I first felt paralyzed by it.  It sucks. If I was in a Saw movie the crazy torture would be me being forced to work on a math workbook until I disappeared.

Needless to say, I'm not a big fan of the maths.  So you better believe it when I say I'm in no hurry to actually go and check the figures on virtually anything.  It's makes me extremely qualified to never be an accountant, but weirdly also qualified for radio. Huh.

Anyway, it would have been nice to have noticed this ages ago, but we don't have that luxury.  Do we have the ability to see where we will be in 6000 show's worth of time?  Not yet, but NASA scientists are probably working on it so we can avoid these situations.

So here's the thing.  I really want to be able to celebrate 6000 shows, and since we have no idea what the future holds, WE'RE STILL GOING TO CELEBRATE 6000 SHOWS.  We're going to celebrate the heck out of our 6000th(?) show this Thursday.  Stop by the Co-op and share your favorite memories from our first 3000 shows, as well as our next 3000 shows.  I can't wait to hear what we'll be up to!  I mean, how many more times will we get to sing MacArthur Park on the air?  Speaking of which, we'll be singing MacArthur Park at 8:30 a.m. on Thursday, so be sure to join us.  It's gonna be fun.


Yeah.  So this has been embarrassing for me in a way that only numbers can make me feel.  I wanna apologize to Shelley for my mess up, and I also want to thank Tyler for letting me know that I messed up.  Also, in the future if everybody could just take our math with a grain of salt and do the radio equivalent of "oh, it's so cute when they do math (patting radio show hosts on the head)" that would be great.

Ugh.  I'm gonna go bury my head in the sand.  This was such a Shyboy Tim moment.

Shyboy

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